Today, I ruled out two potential crushes that were barely on the radar to begin with. To be perfectly honest, it's been such a long time since I was actively interested in anyone that I wondered if I shouldn't just force an infatuation to make sure my emotions still work. Well, either my plan was useless or my emotions really don't work--or both--because it took virtually no time at all for me to lose interest.
Not that these guys aren't nice or interesting or moderately funny. They are, and I'm sure they'll both be exactly what someone else is after. As for me, I just didn't sense that remarkable spark, that little extra something that makes me think, "Yeah, I'm willing to put myself out there for this one."
Well, it's not a race to the finish anyway. I've sprinted through this area of life before and, as anyone might expect, it's left me winded and exhausted. I'm okay to go at my own pace now, thanks. But it is kind of too bad that no one's come up with a heartache inhaler to help you breathe again after it feels like your insides have been crushed.
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